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Friday, January 16, 2009

Just the two of us

So tonight was little girls and my last night alone together-at least for a while. Confusing? here's how my pregnant brain works (besides not very well). We have gotten to spend a lot of time alone together, with the hubby being gone at work, or traveling a lot. So as I was folding laundry I realized that tomorrow my mom is coming into town and that she'll be here until the baby boy is born. Thus making tonight the last night little girl and I will be just the two of us (first mom, and then when she's gone baby brother). Be it the pregnancy hormones or the insanity of being secluded (with hubby gone and no car) for two weeks, I find this to be very sad. Despite the constant clash of attitudes, I love every minute I spend with my baby girl. I love to do her hair, and dress up in princess clothes and dance around. I love that we can cook together and make messes in the flour. I love that she will eat the craziest combinations of food(just like me). I love all the goofy inside jokes we have. I love (and am watchful) how much she emulates me. Although I am excited for this baby boy to come, and I already love him so much, part of me is sad that our daily life will change (big or little) from the way it is now. I suppose baby boy or not it is changing quickly anways, as she is growing up way faster than I would like. (don't get me started on this unless you really want the water works). I love my daughter more than I ever imagined possible. In order to commemorate, we watched Cinderella (our favorite princess movie), ordered pizza w/ veggies (hubby hates veggie pizza-so it's just us girls), and made no-bake cookies(which I don't particulary like but it allowed her to partcipate in the process more). This is the way we actually spend a lot of the nights when we are alone. So nothing razzle dazzle, but I was caught unprepared. I wanted to take pictures but hubby has the camera (in case he saw some nature he wanted to take pictures of...hello?! I am having a moment here! you know whatever).
I know that someday baby boy will be big enough for me to leave and at that point baby girl and I can have one on one time. I am just mourning the end of a part of life that will never return. However, I am sure that there is more and more joy to come.